Walk Into The Rain

This blog is purely fictional.

The names of characters, sequence of events, and

things in particular are purely coincidental.

I give credits to people, don't worry.

Yes, this is arranged in sequence from title to epilogue^^

WALK INTO THE RAIN

AliaMarya FujiSuoh vi Britannia

Acknowledgement

To us ladies,

who had been making our way through the crowd.

To Chidori,

who's always there to put up with my stupidity.

To you dear reader,

for taking time to read my work.

To myself,

for finally being in the mood to right again.

"There is no greater power in the world than the pen and the mind that drives it."

-When Kambia Elaine Flew in From Neptune

Prologue

Sterling,


"Man is born free, but he is always in chains."

That's actually the first quote I saw this morning. It was printed on the back part of a guy's tee. And later, I was surprised to see more of them at school. On the front part of their shirt it screamed: I LOVE PHILOSOPHY.

I don't know why I kept on thinking about it. Part of me thinks it's true. The other part, well. . . I don't know. "Man is born free, but he is always in chains." It kinda had this spark on me-that I was born free, yet I'm struggling to break the smothering chains choking me.

You know that very well, my dear friend. You know everything there is to know about River Antoinette Driscoll, and thank God she found someone like you.

I think I'll catch a cold pretty soon. As you can see, I'm in the library pouring my silenced thoughts into you. It's way too cold with the air condintioning around sixteen degrees celsius. You feel it too, don't you? And look at me, I'm on a sleveless red blouse with a denim vest.

Oh yeah, I'm trying to turn away from the subject again. You see, something happened. It was long before, but the thought just hit me right now. Do you remeber when I told you I almost flunked my college algebra? Yes. That part. I told you it wouldn't bother me right? But you know, the more I run from it, the more it chases me. And once again, I've been dragged to pressure myself to get my grade going.

Whoo! Have you digested it? you can barf it out anytime.

dropping again,

RaD

It ended, it began

"Poverty is not a hindrance to success."

We gave a standing ovation to Christian's valedictory speech as he descended on the stairs with teary eyes. I teared up, well, half of it phony so everyone won't think that I'm a numb skull. I exchanged hugs with my classmates, closest friends, favorite teachers and the last one I ever embraced inside the celebrating-yet-in-sad-departure gymnasium was my grandmother. Jana, my best friend cried too. Only that to her, weeping was obligatory so she won't have any regret.

"Your cheeks stink." grandma said after she kissed me. Maybe it was make-up mixed with tears and wet kisses that generated the stench. I laughed though. "Why don't you invite Jana along? I'll treat you out."

"She's celebrating too, with her parents." I smiled. We headed down to Dunkin Donuts with my brother and gave cheers. Finally, I'm over high school. Months from now, I'd be linking through the university, meet new people, stay late at night, and finally have reasons not to sleep in my own bed.

Before anything else, lemme tell you what I was thinking before graduating:

1. I'm not staying in this drenched city. I'm moving out.
2. I won't attend that must-not-be-named university they keep on insisting. I have hopes and I've been already shunned at my dream school.
3. I'm taking up a course I don't like. Forgive me if I'd shift.
4. Don't expect me to be great in academics. You'll just disappoint yourselves.
5. If i did excel, never ever pressure me.
6. Let me do my own thing and I'll prove you wrong.

"River, you're gonna be late!" my grandmother's voice was enough to make me jump out of bed early in the morning. My cell phone alarmed before that but I refused to pick up. It was the first day of school. Normally, girls would crumble in front of the mirror fixing themselves up. But I'm not normal, am I?

So I entered the portals of the "university" and I was not excited as I had been every school year. I didn't give a damn to how I looked in the must-not-be-named university uniform. Never in a single molecule of a bread crumb did I choose this school. And never will I show some good of me to people I had no interest in meeting with in the first place.

After dealing with my resentment, I concluded:

1. No matter how I try to detest my situation, I can obviously do nothing about it.
2. I'll just have to bear with the alienation until I can find some friends to trust.
3. Pretending isn't bad when it is badly needed. [but never pretend that you're happy if you're not].
4. Don't come late. You'll lose the best sitting places.
5. Smile. [Make sure they won't notice it's fake].
   
6. Prepare everything [don't be like me, but thanks to that...]

I looked at my new seatmate and found him scribbling something.
"What's that?" I asked. He didn't answer. Now, that was very welcoming.
"It's our prospectus." Smiled the girl next to him. "Have you filled it up yet? Here."

She was nice. And seeing her helping me like this made me feel secure.

"Sheine Marshaw, by the way." she added. "He's Van Walker." she pointed to the guy before. "He's just shy, but he's good."
"Yeah. River Driscoll." I nodded.
"Will you be joining us then, River?"
"Darren! You're late." Sheine slapped his chest. "It's a good thing we saved you a seat, Mr. Cunningham."
"Yeah." Darren smiled.

And since that, we hang out.

We

I still felt uneasy. I guess, making new friends and knowing them isn't as easy as pie. Yeah, we do stuff together. We sit in exactly the same seating arrangement in each of our subjects. We copy each others assignments, and laugh at our mistakes. We're good. But Van seemed to be aloof with me. Okay, so let's dig in our files and see what we can do about it.

Name: River Antoinette Driscoll
Age: 18
Likes: Weird and fun things
Dislikes: being manipulated
Describe yourself in one word: extraordinary
A brief essay about you:

They call me River. Nice and sweet, they say. but I tell you, looks can indeed be deceiving. I'm likely to get in trouble, but my kind of trouble is something fun. I'm not easily intimidated. And I guess, that's a reason i don't do well in my studies. Heck no, I can keep with the so-called geniuses if I really wanted to. As they say, "the mind is willing, but the flesh is weak." I make my life out to be exactly how I want it. And I'll knock down anyone who gets in my way. But I can't do anything when my grandma's incharge. I have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. i certainly have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time but my biggest problem is making sure I finish the projects I start.

*******

Name: Sheine Marshaw
Age:19
Likes: pink stuff and roses
Dislikes: being the last to know
Describe yourself in one word: Sensitive
A brief essay about you:

My name is Sheine Marshaw. I'm the youngest in my family. Honestly, I don't do essays. But I warn you-don't ever challenge me in cooking. Else, prepare to lose. I've been trying make my own blue rose but I can't seem to get it right. I work hard not to rock the boat. My easy going attitude brings people together. That's it.

*******

Name: Darren James Cunningham
Age:18
Likes: gadgets
Dislikes: not getting what I want
Describe yourself in one word: Nosy
A brief essay about you:

Yo! Call me Darren, if you please. I'd like to have my own laptop someday. Have you seen Genesis' new i-phone? Man! that was neat! I'd love to get my hands on those. But ah! i'm not that materialistic. I just love having new things. I'm a writer, too. Well, rarely. I tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get me excited... which can be a good or bad thing. Often times, I'm grumpy with other people. I don't appreciate them trying to interfere with my affairs.

*******

Name: Van Quentin Walker
Age:18
Likes: words, letters, poems
Dislikes: wrong grammar, wrong pronounciation, wrong spelling
Describe yourself in one word: Pathetic
A brief essay about you:


Van is a freak. He loves doing things others might consider out of this world. He loves poems and adores J.K Rowling. For him, trivia are petrifying. Words drown his thoughts and papers have been flooding his bag since nineteen forgotten. Van's dream is to study at Hogwarts and be one with the slytherines. He worships Carrie Underwood and gets a knack out of snobbing people. He's a fan of solitude when he's alone. But he'll laugh to death when conversing with his chosen friends. Yes. choosy is the word. I don't make friends with people I don't know. I don't make friends with people who I think is not good. Sorry, his first impressions last. Beware. Oh, he speaks in the third person.



Whew! I got these files out when I was qualified to work part-time in the registrar's office. Hehe. I maybe nosy, but after reading it and knowing my aqcuaintances, I might find a way to talk to them casually.^^

Fetish

It has been exactly two weeks after I entered college. We've been lining up for our attendance after celebrating mass. It was a thanksgiving for the sixty years of Marist presence in the island and as future eductaors, we had to be present. Sheine and Van separated since last names were alphabetized and split into A-L and M-Z. I was almost half-way on the line with Darren infront of me. Suddenly, Darren's high school friend, Leahn called his attention.

"Cunningham! What the hell are you doing here?" Leahn pushed. "How was Hollywood?"
"They kicked me out." Darren laughed. "Said I was overqualified. Oh, well."
"Ah, really? You are such a feeler." She pretended to laugh. "Did you know I was gonna be in American Idol? The kicked me because I was better than Celine Dion. Heck."

I faked a smile when they looked at me. I didn't quite get them, but Darren says that's how they greet each other. "We're just kidding around." Darren would always say.

"Cunningham!"

I turned around and saw him waving at us. He had clean cut, jet black hair. His skin shone under his black polo shirt that screamed all manly. Looking up at him from below gave me a tinggly feeling I always felt when I see people I admire. and by the feel of it, he became one of them.

"Jethro!" Darren waved back. "Long time no see! Come down here!"
"Why don't you go up here?" He flashed a smile.
"Leahn's already up there." I wisphered.
"Later Jet. I have clear my attendance first!" Darren waved his attendance card.
"Suit yourself." Jethro leaned on the pillar next to him.

My eyes were still pinned to him. It's as if I was frozen. He had familiar gestures and I could see he was restless. He kept on hugging the pillar. The next thing, he climed the border and swang his feet. He was like a kid. Not a moment later, his friends came to join him. I sighed. He posed with his chest out. His pinky finger ran on his lips. Not again.

"Jethro, you're being gay again!"
"Hey, Darren." I tugged him. "Is he really... gay?"
"Why don't you ask him yourself?"

"Hey Cunningham!" Jethro called. "I'm beautiful. No matter what you say."

I sighed, deeper.

He spoke

I don't remember the last time I've tried to talk to Van. Of course, I may be one of those people he finds bad. I just don't get it. I get along with Darren and Sheine nicely, but when it comes to him, I just shut up.

He was my first seatmate. He'd been my discussion partner in Psychology class on our first session. Among us four, he's the only lefty. He's my seatmate in Eng 101 and Socsci 111. And when were together, the athmospehere is cold. The mood is dead. Van and I are never gonna be civil to each other. I've never been bothered if people resent my personality but it's different with Van. I mean, I'm with him every single day, single hour, single minute. I really don't care if he hates my guts. But If I were to be friends with him, I'd have to talk to him.

More days pass and all I could do was smile at him. He'd smile back, rarely. I was wondering why he's been cold with me since the beginning of the semester. Did I do something to offend him? Is he angry with me for being close with his friends? Would that be it? I decided. I'd confront him. Okay, so my plan is at hand.

1. Be at school early. He's living outside the city and he's the earlybird.
2. Greet him a good morning. It'll give a great feel.
3. Smile [real, this time.]
4. Start the conversation with regard to academics.

example: "Hey Van, you're mom's a math teacher, right? Did she help you answer our math homework?"

Possible answer: "Yes, she is. No, she didn't."

5. Talk about another subject until I can strike him with my goal.

Reading what I've listed on a crumpled piece of yellow paper, I sighed. I thought of the possible reactions he'd give me.

• "Ah, you mean to say you think I'm aloof? No, I'm still just knowing you after all."
• "So? I'm not talking to you because i don't like you. Leave me alone."
• "It doesn't mean that your friends with Sheine and Darren, I'm your friend too. Get lost."
• "Oh, i'm sorry. I didn't know I was giving you a bad impression. I'm just a little shy."
• He'll laugh.

Regardless of what will happen. I just have to do it.

The next day was full. Hell yeah, we had a lot of quizzes and I haven't been able to confront him. Now, what'll I do?

"River." Van tapped my shoulder." Got a minute?"

"Why?" I asked.

He didn't reply. He gave me a long piece of paper and written on it was: "There's someone who wants to steal your wit and nobility. Don't worry, he's not scary, but he's deadly."

"Wha-Who?"

When I turned around, he was gone.

Dagger incoming

"There is someone who wants to steal your wit and nobility. Don't worry, he's not scary, but he's deadly."

I didn't know what to do after reading that long piece of paper Van gave me. What was he talking about? was this a joke? If this was some sort of prank, It ain't funny.

"Hey." I called.
"Hmm?" Van faced me.
"What was that about?"
"Huh?"
"You know, that warning you gave me." I looked at him hard.
"You still don't get it, do you?"

I raised my eyebrows. Clearly, I didn't understand him. I never understood him since the beginning. We never talked much and this was the first normal conversation we had. And I still can't comprehend.

"Can't you see it, River?" He stared.
"See what?" I was getting annoyed by his suspense-like attitude.
"Are you really that stupid?"
"Stop answering my questions with another question!"
"I'm making you understand the situation here." I could sense he was getting angry.

I've been dense ever since the world began and I can never really sense if people are angry, sad, or disappointed by my actions (actually the reason why I'm planning on shifting to Psychology). Yeah, sure, I can't please everybody. That's reality. But If I face this people and tell them to buzz off of my life and mind their own businesses would make me denser than ever.

"Just tell me who the hell it is." I sighed.
"Darren."

I gasped. I looked at Darren by the door. He smiled.

"Darren?" My brows met.
"I know, I'm sorry." Van held his hands up. "But I've known him since high school. Can't you tell, Riv? His envious of you. Your smart, the smartest among us four. and Rich. We were from public high schools and you've been, like, cooped up in a convent since childhood."
"So?" I stammered.
"He's materialistic. Believe me." Van sighed.

But Darren was so nice to me. Yeah, he had shown me his avaricious side, but I accepted that.

"Okay. I'll try to observe." I said.
"I'm just concerned."
"Yeah, thanks."
"Okay, okay, settle down." Prof Ocean entered the room.

My classmates waded their way to the seats and Darren sat beside me.

"Look Riv, I got this watch for ten bucks yesterday. But wouldn't it be neat if it was real Timex?" He showed me a fake.
"Yeah." I forced a smile.

Well said

Okay, let's get this straight. Why in the world does Darren have to be envious of River?

1. I am NOT rich. If not for the scholarship, I wouldn't even be here!
2. Yes, I rooted from a convent-like school, but hell. I was a scholar!
3. Smart? I'm confident I can't lose to others, ability-wise. BUT I'm not smart enough for him to be insecure of.

The next day, the four of us, me, Van, Darren, and Sheine, waded our way through the smooth pavement around the College of Engineering and Technology for our Natural Science class. We were a bit early and decided to stop over the covered area where benches and tables were filled of techie stuff. Of course, as an instrument of development, the Must-Not-Be-Named University had this part of school WiFied for student use.

We found a nice spot at the end of the covered area and dumped our things on the table.

"Wah!" I wiped some sweat off my forehead. "Curse it. Why does it have to be on the third floor? The staircases are killing me."
"Ahaha. Hey, at least we'll be able to lose weight." Sheine smiled.

I looked at Van, he didn't respond. My eyes settled on Darren, he was looking at engineering students tinkering their laptops, notebooks, and palm pilots.

"Man, look Riv, Don't you wish we had one of those?" Darren pinched me. "Why don't you ask your grandma for one?"
"Dar, even I don't have that much money." I replied. Van rolled his eyes.
"Huh?" He smiled.

The bell rang. We went to class.

"Class. Environment week starts tomorrow. I need three people for a singing contest." Prof. Ocean said. Darren started singing in a very low voice. I believed he wanted to be nominated.
"It would be a solo and a duet."
"Why don't you join?" I said. "You have a pretty good voice."
"Maybe." He giggled.

Fairy Dein got the solo spot, as for the duet, nobody volunteered.

"Sir, sir, Darren sings pretty well." Jessie raised.
"Huh?" I could see he acted surprised.
"River and him could do the duet!" Jeff added.
"Oh yeah, River was a soprano in her high school choir." Jessie smiled.

"Oh." Darren looked at me.
"Do you want to do it?" I asked.
"What about you?"
"Maybe?"

We got the part. I was happy. I really wanted to sing. But I felt Darren's hesitation. He didn't say anything.

"Hey, Why don't I do the solo so Fairy and you could do the duet?" I suggested.
"Neat, very." His face brightened. "Yeah, I'll go tell Fairy."

They never gave me an answer. And the day of the contest came. We didn't do anything.

"Well, what a waste." Jeffery commented. "And you could've top it."
"Yeah? well, Darren doesn't really want to sing..." I sighed. "With me, that is."
"He told me that, too." Jeff confessed. "He doesn't like you."

I was surprised. but I had to say something.

"Hmm? Well, boastful as he is. I don't like him too."

Van was right.

Have a break

"Hey, why don't we skip class for a while?" Darren was leading our way to the cafeteria.
"Oh?" Van said, eyeing me.

I wanted to slap his face and give Darren the finger. Tell him to go to hell and get lost while he's at it.

"Hey." Sheine tapped my shoulder. "You okay? You seem to be bothered these days."
"Not bothered. Angry sounds more like it." I pouted.
"Like Riv, did something happen?" Darren asked.

I rolled my eyes. What the hell is this setting? Is he playing with me or something? Screw you Darren James Whitmore! And Van's pretending he doesn't know anything. Sheine's pretty much clueless and I'm in awe. Argh.

"So, are we going to skip class or what?" Darren began again.
"No we're not." Van said, clutching his bag. "You are clearly insane. We have a quiz for crissake."

Darren didn't wince. The way Van said it was calm and cool, unlike the impulsive miss Sheine.

"I forgot to study." I scratched my head. "Oh man, I feel like I'm loosing it."
"Eh? With your big brain you can actually pull it off!" Darrn hugged me. "Just don't forget to share it with us... You know."
"I think I'm skipping class." I said. "I don't feel so good."

I left the group and found myself going inside the library. I checked the time as I opened the door to the internet section and used a computer. For whaterver reason, I wanted to get away from Darren as far as possible. I can't say I'm entirely affected, but it does give me a feeling. And I hate it.

BUZZ!

FuRiKaKe: waa! ur onlyn!

I got a buzz message from Furikake A.K.A. Sprinkle Aerith Stryfe. Yes, her name is actually Sprinkle, and She's my and Jana's (from it ended, it begun) bestfriend. A trio to be exact. and I was surprised, excited. I haven't had a real chat with her since she migrated three years ago!

riverotter: OMG! ur onlyn too! Wts up?
FuRiKaKe: Nothn much.. juz chttn wt my relatvs^^
riverotter: gosh, I mz u! muwah!
FuriKaKe: I mz u 2! Heard u wer doin great in colej. kip it up!
riverotter: Luk who's talkin. ur doin great there 2! I wouldn't hav known f
Jana didn't tel me!^^

Having that chat with Sprinkle eased me a bit. And I was totally sad when she said she had to sleep already. How I wish it wouldn't have ended so I couldn't think of my college social life for a while. I didn't notice the next bell rang and I rushed to get out of the library.

I ran, not knowing my shoelaces were untied. I tripped. It damn hurt when I fell down the stairs and I bumped someone and dragged him down with me.

"Ow!" I yelped.
"God.." I heared him sigh in pain. "Hey, are you okay?"
I opened my eyes slowly. "My head hurts."
"Can you breathe?" He whispered.
*The breathing thing rings a bell." I groaned. "But then you are on top of me cutting off my airsupply."
He giggled.
"Why are you still on top of me?"
"That's a very good question." He smiled. "Now let's get you up."
"You smell like pineapple airfresheners." I fainted.
"I get that a lot."





*credits to the movie The Wedding Planner for the scene.^^

Knock in the head

"Oh God, you're alive!"

I heard Sheine's shrill cry as the door closed. It banged open again and I caught sight of Van and Darren walking towards me.

"You got us worried man." Darren sighed. "Good thing "the teach" was MIA."
"How the hell did you fell down like that?" Van crossed his arms.
"My shoelaces." I said, almost in a whisper. "untied."

They laughed, except for Sheine.

"Dimwits!" She shouted. "River just fell off the stairs! Could you guys be more concerned!?"
"Shouting isn't allowed here."

He was dressed in entirely white armed with a stethoscope hanging from his neck. Nurses should've had their hair combed neatly in place. But his jet black locks were kind of messy, yet they look very clean.

"How are you feeling, Ms. Driscoll?" He gazed at me with his deep blue eyes.
"I was feeling fine a minute ago..." I said. "But now I feel I had a headache thanks to Van and Darren."
"Want me to kick them out?" Sheine joked.
"Van would be glad to wait outside." Van smiled.
"Hey, she was joking." Darren slpped his chest.

"Ah, Kids..."
"Heck, you're a kid yourself, Keilun." Sheine poked his waist.

He chukled as he gently put his hand in my forehead. He had a sprain bandage on.

"Your hand." I spoke.
"Oh, uh... you fell on it. Remember?"

"Hey Sheine, you know the guy?" Darren asked.
"Oh, he used to be my neighbor." Sheine answered.

"Sorry for the late introduction. My name is Keilun Simms. I just graduated from Nursing and now I'm a med student."
"On duty?" Van asked.
"Pretty much." Keilun smiled. "And also, thanks to Ms. Driscoll here, I found a wonderful specimen for my thesis report."

"Specimen?Me?" I was surprised. "Am i gonna be dissected?"
"Pretty much." He flashed his smile again. "For answers, that is."

I pouted as I took his smile. He was indeed a good-looking fella. And he's a med student. He looked smart, which I think he really was and he was kind to take care of me after the accident.

"C'mon River. Next class is about to start." Van helped me up.

I stood up and checked my clothes, my hair and made the bed.

"I guess we'll leave the dissection for now, huh?" Keilun led us out.
"Pretty much, yes."

The four of us got out of the university clinic and headed to next class. I was still thinking about Keilun. I didn't even thank him.

Words

Not long after my fall I've been going through the clinic pavement a lot. I wanted to see Keilun again. I've been thinking much about him lately and I guess it's not only that I want to see him. I've been attracted to him.





"You're early." Van called. He was sitting near the dean's office with papers on the desk.

"Homework?" I said as I raised a piece of paper.



He didn't respond and I took it as a permission for me to read what he had written. I sat down quitely and looked at him scribble in another peice of paper. I began reading the paper I held.

I am the master of my soul;

I am the captain of my faith.

Invictus. I looked at him.



"You can have it." He said, gathering his stuff. " Van's got lots of them at home."

"Poetry?"

"Van's faves Emily Dickinson actually."

"Why is Van referring to himself in the third person?" I asked.

"He's an idiot." He sneezed after that.

"They say idiots can't catch a cold." I laughed. "But morons can."

"Van's a moron then." He stood up.



He disappeared from my sight and I was still holding on to the paper. I flipped it.

Hey River, if you must know, I feed myself with nose bleedingly,
nonsensical rhetorics and I'm glad you can keep up with my impossible attitude
of being cold to people.

some factoids about me: I'm cyber-ignorant. I don't use the internet that
much and the hell I care. I'm in love with words. J.K Rowling is my God.

I raised a brow. What the hell is he trying to do? He can talk to me if he wants to.



The next day, I found him again on the same spot, doing the same things, giving another paper with flowering words. This went on for more than a week, then finally it stopped. One English class though, he slipped a piece of paper between my fingers. and I was out the room when I decided to keep it.



I want to tell you something. I put my trust in you. Will you be my secret keeper?



"Love notes?" an unfamiliar whisper knocked on my conciousness. I turned around and saw Keilun beside me. I didn't respond quickly.



"Are you still up for that dissection we were talking about weeks ago?" He broke the awkward silence.

"I-I guess."

He smiled. "Clinic, Friday. I'll be there the whole day."



He already entered the room but the smell of his presence still lingered on me for minutes. A poke came from behind. Van.



"What do you say?"

"huh?"

"The favor. you know." he said.

"Oh yeah. I'll do it." I smiled. "You can trust me."